Sneak Peek 11: The Circus in Me, S.M. Bjarnson

“My name and place are of no concern to you or the board members, you suppose I should confess my wills too. I am pure in thought and mind. My reputation or report does not fall into your hands. I send all undignified claims to God. You sir, my brother, elder, Ashlee’s padre, claim whatever name fits you best. Are in dire need of editing your remarks on the obligation others have to confide in you, for we are both made from His Divinity.”“No need to raise your tone, young lady. Do realize though physically we are made from similar materials, in spirit quite the opposite of ingredients. I will always float higher.”“You're confessing to me that I am below you as a human? Because you stand behind a desk and have Bishop in front of a calling? Does that make sense? Orate to me that I am lesser in God’s eyes because of a position?” Stricken with benevolent words, all of us equals.“Who are you to question Him?” Standing abruptly slamming down the mug of warm water.“Who are you not to question?” My spoken word soft and confident.

-S.M. BJARNSON

(Today is also my birthday! I wish I was in Las Vegas!) Yay :)  

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Beliefs or Barriers? - S.M. Bjarnson

Beliefs or Barriers?

S.M. Bjarnson 

As writer, bloggers, authors, readers, all of the above, we have restrictions on our minds we may not even realize. Our belief system put into place at a very young age brought up to believe and orientate one certain function or way. I have read many books, books that lie, cheat, steal, kill, swear, sweat, you know real life story books. It seems highly unnecessary to grant the submission of banning a book when the great writers of today were moved if not inspired by these works of literature. 

Rowell was, according to her blog, absolutely devastated by this treatment. She wrote “When these people call Eleanor & Park an obscene story, I feel like they’re saying that rising above your situation isn’t possible. That if you grow up in an ugly situation, your story isn’t even fit for good people’s ears. That ugly things cancel out everything beautiful.” 

Not necessarily a negative aspect, but also may not be a positive one. You limit yourself to read things because you are advised not too! Just so you know this may get a little philosophical so beware! I recently saw a picture of books that have now since been banned from libraries and school media centers, why, because they have to far out ideas. I mean we grew up with these books people! Winnie the pooh-My all time favorite as a kid. Was taken away from young readers minds because talking animals offend God. By the way I have found a perfect explain of the list of banned books! Here on this website! http://www.pajiba.com/station_agents/30-banned-and-challenged-kids-books-that-will-make-you-feel-terrible-about-humanity.php#.U3EeJPldUZw

Also on this undermined list of books, there is the historical, if not educational autobiography by none other than Anne Franks. Anne Frank: The Diary Of A Girl: This year (THIS YEAR) in New Hampshire, the Holocaust classic was challenged in Michigan for the following reasons: “It’s pretty graphic, and it’s pretty pornographic for seventh-grade boys and girls to be reading. It’s inappropriate for a teacher to be giving this material out to the kids when its really the parents’ job to give the students this information.” Though the book wasn’t banned in Michigan, it was briefly banned in Virginia in, wait for it, 2010. 

I just would like to ask one question about this and I will move right along to other charades of enterprise; are we idiots? Let's talk about this Anne Frank was a key role in one of the biggest monumental times, for her diary we are engulfed in the Holocaust. If it were not for her being there and writing those journal entries we would have veered off into someone else words, maybe not the right words. I am saying is that she was alive and her book was published for a reason, to teach us if not educate us. 

The Giving Tree: Because the tree is overly compliant and, yes, giving and the boy is demanding and selfish this book has been called sexist. 

Tell me are we that bored with reality we have to ruin the childhood of young adults everywhere to prove some mythical point of beliefs brand new. You can not please everyone, but I wonder, if these people ever get tired of themselves, these individuals that fight everyone on every little detail. 

What is a world we are not able to read freely? What is a planet without books? Our imaginations dried and starving for literature. What makes others think they can choose and pick the ideas we want to believe in or expose ourselves too?

His Dark Materials: Much like Harry Potter, the objection here is a religious one. Though I strongly disagree with the complaint, it is, in this instance, far more justified. Phillip Pullman’s beautiful trilogy does, yes yes, involve some kids on a mission to kill God (aka The Authority). So I can see how that might make some parents look askance. Though Pullman is vocally, frankly anti-organized religion, I don’t think he’s anti-faith. He’s said: “[I]n my view, belief in God seems to be a very good excuse, on the part of those who claim to believe, for doing many wicked things that they wouldn’t feel justified in doing without such a belief.”

Tell me are we fools?

Harriet The Spy: This book was challenged in the 1980s in Ohio for teaching “children to lie, spy, back-talk and curse.”

 Are they our beliefs 

or are they barriers? 

All quotes on books banning are from this blog: http://www.pajiba.com/station_agents/30-banned-and-challenged-kids-books-that-will-make-you-feel-terrible-about-humanity.php#.U3EeJPldUZw

Photo Credit: http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http%3A%2F%2Foakconsult.co.uk%2Fwp%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2012%2F11%2Fmind-barriers.jpg&imgrefurl=http%3A%2F%2Foakconsult.co.uk%2Fwhy-not-or-why-not-removing-personal-barriers-to-success%2F&h=350&w=318&tbnid=F7-iogPRdLvDdM%3A&zoom=1&docid=oqCjGPoq8WsL-M&ei=dxxxU5fCCYL3oASajoDwAQ&tbm=isch&ved=0CIsBEDMoLjAu&iact=rc&uact=3&dur=481&page=2&start=30&ndsp=35

Sneak Peek 9: The Circus in Me, S.M. Bjarnson

Ashlee set me up! I know she did! Was all I could think as I entered that office. Called in to meet with who declared leadership. Titles called to him as the Bishop or in this very case Branch President.
Escorted into the square office.
“Tracey Aliza it’s come to my attention that you’ve been having inappropriate relations with a fellow male student.” He waited for my response. As if there was a sign on his forehead that read please confess weaknesses and every imperfection.“Excuse me sir?” Confused is this how it works? Were we supposed to confess everything bad ever thought?
“There have been rumors.” His knuckles white crisscrossed over one another.
“Rumors? Sir?” Baffled as I was, I began to understand that it was not tolerated to have relations with the opposite sex. True to my nation, I understood this was just like the rules I’d grown to know.“Speculations you are acting unworthy, my dear.” I am most certain I have never been anyone’s so called dear. Let alone a man I have just made as an acquaintance.“Speculations? I assume following up on gossip? Are those corrections in order?” A rough patch growing in my throat.
“Gossip. We do not listen to such tall tales. Here on provable facts here.” Soon I would find out what sin I would plead forgiveness.
“I assure you sir, I am not involved with any male figures. I know not to speak to the boy students and all that Jazz.” My hands began to shake. I slapped them together tucking between the kneecaps. 

S.M. BJARNSON

I'm Only Living a Lie When I tell my soul I am fine, by S.M. Bjarnson

It wasn't clear to me about how far our livelihood had come.

We are travelers on a path nobody has a map too. 

I listen to the yearnings that pull me to every unmentionable path. 

I am alone.

Watching the waves hitting the bottom pits of the ocean.

They are encircled in time when there has been no time but now.

We are living in a breathless fought over universe only we are the only ones at battle.

With ourselves we are the only ones looking for victory when victory has already given into us, time and time again.

We are poor soldiers waiting to go home, awaiting a decision from the leaders we think execute their plans with us in mind and not from their own ambitious winnings.

We were right weren't we, leading a team of masked teenagers into a battle, no one had ideas of winning.

Our paths stained with generational bloodlines. 

Our maps colored with veins.

The world was a line and there had been for curves created to save those who were not absolute in the eyes of our leaders.

Claims and taughting of voices made it clear we had no voice or reason to commute the exile pathway.

After everything is said and down we evidently find ourselves at the beginning again, with a clearer frame of mind, understanding what roads to neglect and others to partake in the journey of.

Rumors will be true if you let them live on.

The fictitious character we call time can be reset anytime.

I'm only living a lie when I tell my soul I am fine.

-S.M. Bjarnson

A piece at a time, -S.M. Bjarnson

My concentration broke and I was at the worst of them. Breathing under strict rule of where and when I was to leave and bleed my words and to whom. My glued eyes shut I reminisce in a once victorious land. I stand alone at the battle field of the mercenaries. I am a king if not a queen to the trap of solitude. I am the heir to a terrible crumbling kingdom. With cruel intent I will seek them out to become more than just a maiden in a chamber. There will be blood as there always is the red stain among the men in history.

Wishful thinking tells us that we are longer good, we are longer able. Who is the judge in the case? The ruler that signifies us disruptive. For a short time we may live out the remaining years will a solemn prayer of being an achievement of the human race, but you see that is the mistake we are all in a race.

Hills and valleys will let us know if our succession is relevant or rather a mistake of guidance on our elders part. We are children being led away with a string or a rope, led to another world where our imagination is held captive and our irrelevant lives became purposeful.

We stood through streams and creeks remembering our fallen brothers. The cold chills turning over the aged rocks, exposing secrets my lovely sisters kept. A dark hidden past was one thing and then another when the light made it glow. Terminal, the position our beloved on us. Our potion was a category for defeat and victory was not on the contents of victory. Sacrifice on the other hand was a very big ingredient in the poison.

Fruit taken from the tempting tree were we all at the devils hands, tug graves and cutting corners. There was music in the air. Swirling the temptations of what had come and what had not. We would not last the night, the morning dew taking the place of our final determination. Trembling words fluctuated around the matters of factual and factious.

Could you remind me of my crime dear sir? Could you so ever gallantly refresh my deprived memory of the crimes you accuse of me committing?

There was a line I had drawn upon the fallen walls of the kingdom we called home. White marks leading up and down and curve to remind us we were never to be left alone in this day in this age, we were prisoners. We were the answer to the most disgusting of questions.

The solutions for a match made in ever. Our turbulence qualified for a ok landing, but there was nothing and we stood for exactly that.

A piece at a time.

-S.M. Bjarnson

Lazy as Goodbye

It was a lazy Sunday, you were going away, again.

The leaves were changing and you thought it would be a good time for leaving.

You call me up, I said what’s going on?

You said, I’m leaving.

Where you going?

Why you leaving…me, again?

I thought I told you, you can’t do this anymore.

If you wanted to be gone, you should have stayed away the first time.

You should have stayed gone.

But, now you’re back, and there isn't no changing that.

I know you’re scared, because you've never been hurt before.

You think leaving will save you from that heart ache.

But, I’m still the one here, you’re only hurting me.

Just give this a chance, a chance to be something more than a day in misery.

Now we may fight, we may curse, but baby were strong enough to get through all that trouble.

Look at me, feel this love.

Don’t be scared of tomorrow’s problems.

Because, today is today and tomorrow may never come.

Let’s live today.

Please just tell me one thing do you love me?

Do you want to be here with me?

Where you going?

Why you leaving me, again?

I thought I told you, you can’t do this again.

If you wanted to be gone, you should have stayed away the first time.

You should have stayed gone.

But, now you’re back, and there isn't no changing that.

You look at me, fear deep in your eyes.

My smile comforts you and brings hope to them.

Don’t worry, I say.

I won’t be leaving anytime soon baby.

You say me either.

I’m staying for good, this time.

 -S.M. Bjarnson

Deepok Chopra Quote

The universe has no fixed agenda. Once you make any decision, it works around that decision. There is no right or wrong, only a series of possibilities that shift with each thought, feeling, and action that you experience.

A New Day

Do you know what day it is? Did you smell it as you woke up this morning, wondering where it had gone and wondering where it shall go? The moments began to pass in a film strip; in unison, remarks to purpose and passion, people and among other things, politics. I wonder am I looking back, as I travel over the two sided bridge. Am I taunting the ways i once saw my own self. Where had the time gone? Let alone the depiction of martyrs and heroes. We are all alike, like petals on a flower, leaves falling from the autumn trees; no longer green, but orange in their rhymes. Turning tables, you'll find marks upon scratch lines telling you the truth. Not only to the ones who you've loved, but those who always wonder. Time will tell as it always has in this hour, in this day. 

-S.M. Bjarnson

Quote of the Day!

Change is good it helps us remember we are surviving the evolution of mankind.